The Art of Saving (pt2)
Frugal Chic® 59: Why saving becomes enjoyable when you stop seeing it as deprivation and start seeing it as optionality.
A lot of people approach saving as a necessary evil, something they compromise on because they feel they ought to. Like going to the dentist or eating the greens on your plate. A boring but necessary part of being financially healthy.
While others seem to enjoy it. Shock.
From the outside, it makes no sense. Why not just enjoy life now? We don’t know how long we’ve got, and tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
In this issue
Why the Die with Zero argument is compelling, but incomplete
The problem with reading “enjoy life now” through YOLO eyes
How saving small amounts in your early 20s becomes an unofficial cheat code
Why an FU fund matters, particularly for women
How buying ETFs started feeling like buying freedom
The argument for spending your money
In Bill Perkins’ book Die with Zero, he argues that instead of hoarding wealth, money’s true value is creating meaningful experiences. You should aim to spend your wealth, and not be too concerned with passing on inheritance to your kids.
This is a very strong argument, which I agree with to an extent. For example, you should travel when you’re relatively young because having that same experience at 80 won’t feel the same. It’s not impossible, but it won’t be as enjoyable.
Equally, memories pay dividends. You’re able to reflect on your life and re-live the good times, as opposed to if you just scrimped and saved with nothing to look back on.
Another interesting point is optimised inheritance. Leaving money to your kids when they are retired makes much less sense, and doing it sensibly can bypass the hefty 40% inheritance tax in the UK, although there are strict rules around this which are subject to change (not financial advice).
These are all compelling points, and I’d agree. However, if seen by the wrong eyes, the eyes of someone who’s never saved or considered things like investing, it could feed the common mindset of “YOLO” when it comes to money.
Balance in any area of life is key
Balance in any area of life is key, and I don’t believe absolutes are helpful to anyone. Just like a diet, a financial diet needs variety. If one were truly to spend endlessly, this, as we know, leads to many problems.
Having no savings or assets leaves you at the mercy of the whims of others, giving you very little optionality.
My case for saving in my early 20s, even if it started with small amounts on an entry-level wage, was that I had learnt about concepts like compound growth, investing for the long term and the benefits of delayed gratification.
I knew that starting early gave me an unofficial cheat code for getting ahead. While peers thought saving only £50 was virtually pointless, I knew it was building my emergency fund, then funding investments that could compound over time.
I still did all the things one would do at that age. I worked a normal job, saw friends multiple times a week, bought clothes and went out from time to time. I’d had a rebellious phase in my teens, so I’d got over the feeling that in order to live life to the fullest, I had to be out into the early hours of the morning. So I was quite grounded and saved as much as I could.
The uncomfortable groundwork
This period of putting my head down was amplified when I started posting content alongside my job, which really just started as a hobby. I never expected to make a penny from it, but that added a layer of graft to this time.
I was saving and investing aggressively and utilising most of my free time to make more money. Like anything, at the start it was small. I was getting £200 for a brand deal. But over time, it grew.
I was at a point of juggling a full-time job, content, the occasional modelling job, trying to maintain a social life, relationship, etc, and saving a lot. I just reflect on it as being a bit of an uncomfortable time. I knew I was working hard so I could enjoy life later.
By later, I don’t mean at 60. I just knew I was setting the groundwork to move out and have more financial freedom. When I was still living at home, I had no idea I would leave my 9-5, but it’s like I was unknowingly also setting myself up to do that.
That’s the part I wish I could tell my 18-year-old followers, or anyone who can’t be convinced to save or have a side hustle. It may feel like it’s not going anywhere at the start, but it’s the principle. The habits you build now set the framework for how you live in your 20s and 30s.
I still follow the same Frugal Chic philosophy I did when I was on £30k a year. I pay myself first, I diversify my income, I splurge on what I truly value and I cut down unnecessary spending, even if I don’t have to now. Because money doesn’t change people, it only amplifies who they already are. You’re still making a vote for who you are now.
Seeing saving as a promise to myself
So what switched? How did I go from seeing saving as boring to something enjoyable? It’s almost incomprehensible why someone would want to do that.
Firstly, I treated it as a promise to myself. Kind of like how people don’t actually need certain results from the gym, they just want to be consistent, to be healthy and to show up for themselves. Saving was a way to do that.
I found that because I was doing it unconsciously, for example, setting up a direct debit to my savings, it felt even easier to keep this promise.
When you keep promises to yourself, it builds confidence. You’re saying to yourself, I mean what I say. That’s a powerful feeling.
Saving as empowerment
Secondly, there is a serious gap in wealth between men and women. Of course, times are changing, and I’m actually now out-earning men my age, but it doesn’t change the overall system.
The UK gender wealth gap stands at around 21%, with men holding an average total wealth of £378,079 compared with £300,017 for women. That is a difference of around £78,000. The gap is even more severe when you look at pensions: the Women’s Budget Group reports a gender pension gap of 43%, with men holding nearly £67,000 more in pension wealth than women.
The UK also has one of the largest gender pension gaps in the OECD, with OECD data showing women receive monthly pensions more than 35% lower than men’s in the UK.
So saving and investing my money was a way of empowering myself. I always talk about an FU fund: a pot of money you have in case you want to walk away. That’s the most important thing, even if you don’t think you need it.
Because for women, money is not just numbers on a spreadsheet. It’s the ability to leave a bad job, a bad relationship, a bad living situation, or a version of your life that no longer fits.
Getting addicted to the number increasing
Thirdly, I got addicted to seeing the number increase. I almost gamified it.
I remember going to a friend at the time and saying, “Look, I’ve been keeping track of my dividends from investing.” I showed her my Notes app: “£0.56 from Coca-Cola.”
“Ohh, that’s nice,” she said, with a forced smile, nodding encouragingly as if I were a toddler showing a drawing.
The point is, I was into it. It was a hobby. No one’s judgement could convince me it was pointless, and I enjoyed it. Now I have over £100k invested, proving there are worse addictions to have and starting small is completely valid.
Replacing shopping with other interests
Fourthly, I managed to start saving more because I replaced shopping with other interests.
I like to say I sadly substituted my “swag” for this life now. I don’t dress nearly as experimentally or cool as I used to, but I actually am happier now.
Before, I was constantly wondering whether I was wearing the right thing, what the cool “in the know” brands were, and trying to stay up to date with trends.
Now my wardrobe is, on the surface, boring. But it works for me. The attention has moved elsewhere to films, the gym, creating content, travelling, that I just don’t care as much anymore.
Buying assets aka buying freedom
I wasn’t just saving, I was buying assets aka buying my freedom.
Once I started to view buying ETFs as buying my freedom, I felt so much more inclined to keep going. It meant I was bringing my retirement age down even further.
This was when I was at my 9-5 and desperate to escape. Obviously, I enjoy work, clearly, and therefore it’s not about escaping work entirely, but increasing optionality.
The takeaway
Those are a few mindset shifts I made in order to grasp the art of saving.
That being said, I wasn’t just saving. I was investing. I was building simultaneously. This isn’t me saying, coupon your way to happiness. It’s saying that saving gives you options, and options, particularly as a woman, are power.
And maybe this is where I return to Die with Zero. I don’t think the goal is to die with the biggest investment portfolio and no memories. That sounds bleak. But I also don’t think the goal is to spend everything in the name of “living life” while quietly removing your own choices.
To me, the point is to use money while you’re alive. But that includes using it to buy experiences, yes, and also using it to buy peace, leverage, confidence and the ability to walk away.
If you’ve always struggled to see what the point is, let this be proof that at the start it can feel small. But saving is a promise to yourself, and over time, that promise compounds into confidence and optionality.
That’s all this week,
Mia xx